Bollywood's warped take on adultery dictates that every husband's chief passion after cricket and before pissed-drunk-dancing is cheating on their wives. And husbands will cheat, regardless of whether or not their wives are naggers, nosey, indifferent or caring. Why? Because from 'Biwi No 1' to 'No Entry' this genre has broken every box office record, that's why! And Anees Bazmee's 'Thank You' is yet another to further engrave the above point.
If you've clicked on the promo at the end of this page, you know this film is about three cheating husbands, Raj (Bobby Deol), Yogi (Suniel Shetty) and Vikram (Irrfan Khan). What you don't know is that they're involved in the business of luxury yachts in Canada and can afford fancy sports cars and mansions. But professions in films are as detailed as the makeup man's dialogues in the film, so the unfounded affluence is only fair.
Anyway, getting to the cheating part. Being Bollywood heroes, even cheating has to involve singing, dancing and perhaps some playful bum-slapping (synchronised to the beats of the song 'Pyaar Do Pyaar Lo') with their countless firang girlfriends. So while Raj, Yogi and Vikram go about with their extra-marital affairs unperturbed, Raj's wife, Sanjana (Sonam Kapoor) doubts her husband and hires Kishan (Akshay Kumar), private detective by profession, flutist by characterization. Predictably, Kishan blows his flute to strip each of the husbands down to their bare basics. Now, one of the hardest things to do when you get out of this movie, is trying to forget this flute tune that is played over 200 times in the movie. The tune has a piercing, sharp effect and ear buds, tongue-cleaners and nose picking wouldn't scrape it out of your senses.
The film's most painful attribute is undisputedly, Kishan. He clowns about through the movie enough to make even Jerry Lewis seem sophisticated and suave. His nonsensical dancing graces all the 100 songs in the film, including the sad number where the husbands are supposed to realise they've wronged their wives and feel remorse. But their remorse hardly sizes up to yours, as you crush your expensive multiplex ticket inside your fist, waiting for this moral science lecture on adultery to end.
To the film's credit, Irrfan is refreshing with his absurd dialogues and Suniel Shetty's adorable buffoonery might offer a momentary grin. To the film's debit, Sonam Kapoor's dialogue delivery is right out of a pre-school theatrical and her laughter is as matter-of-fact as her weeping (and the movie has oodles of both). Rimi Sen and Celina Jaitley play docile and tyrant wives respectively without changing the order of the movie. Pritam's songs copy each other in this film as every song sounds like the previous one, apart from the refurbished version of 'Pyaar Do..'.
As you approach the last 30 minutes of this comedy of tragedies, the only cheating you want to do, is ditching this movie to have an affair with anything that's playing in the neighbouring screen. So, go ahead and thank me for saving you the time, effort, money and brain cells.