How to Know Your Spouse Better in Arranged Marriage


Vishal and Leena shared an enviable chemistry on their wedding day. It is hard to believe that their story is just two months old when both met in a typical arranged marriage set up. They connected well and went out on ‘dates’. Three months into the marriage, today, both are discovering new things about each other almost every day.

With greater technology connect and the way it is approached, the concept of arranged matches has changed over the years. What has, however, not changed is the mystery it holds. “No matter how much you communicate before marriage, you get to know a lot of things later,” says Vishal. “You don’t sit and interview each other. You slowly and gradually get to know each other,” he adds. True, but how does the understanding come about? We asked a few couples around to find best ways of getting to know your spouse after an arranged marriage:

Communicate and Express

"Ask each other’s opinion about different things, say an important event in the family or may be a show on TV,” advices Megha Sehgal, who got married to Shailesh within a couple of months of meeting him. “That gives you an understanding of how the other person thinks,” she adds.

Recommended Read: What to Ask a Girl in the First Meeting in Arranged Marriage

Express clearly. It is an initial phase and the person doesn’t know when to take something with a pinch of salt. Vishal shares an amusing incident, “Initially, she took everything I said very seriously. Like, if I nonchalantly said I’m hungry in the middle of the night, she would get up to cook something. I then had to tell her that I didn’t want her to act on it,” chuckles Vishal.

Together Time

Whether you live in a joint family or separately, remember to take out some ‘together time’. Go for dinner, a movie or a drive. “Listen to a plenty of songs from Yash Chopra’s movies when you go on a drive,” laughs Vijay Bhatia, a movie buff and a die-hard romantic. Well, whatever works to bring in the romance! The idea is letting the other person know what interests you and knowing if he/she appreciates it.

Understanding the environments

Friends know you the best. So, it is a good idea to know your partner through their friends’ eyes. Talk to close relatives. The “when he was a kid” tales often have a lot of insights about a person’s personality! However, do not be judgmental. “A friend might tell you a funny incident about your husband and some girl or the time he behaved foolishly. Do not judge him or be critical about it; it’s only an exercise to know the phase when you weren’t there,” suggests Megha.

Recommended Read: Bollywood Traits that Can Make you Her Real Hero

Space out

To understand each other closely, it is also important to give some space. “It’s important that your partner gets time to do things she likes or meet her friends. Similarly, you should go and meet your friends. It isn’t essential to stick together everywhere. The individuality comes out when the person is happy in one’s own space, making it easy for the other person to know you better,” advices Vijay.
But narrow the space in case of a conflict. “Never let a third person – be it your mother or his – get involved. Do not let it go unresolved but then do not let another person in between,” opines Megha.

Recommended Read: 7 Things Men Should Stop Doing after Becoming Husbands

Accept the differences

Finally, you cannot break the ice unless you open your mind to the differences your personalities have. “I like to keep my drawer organised but she is not very particular about that. She likes to neatly arrange the cupboard, which I don’t care much about,” shares Vishal. That is but a small example of the little differences you might have, which require an open mind and heart to understand and accept.

These were some of the ways to know your spouse better. With understanding and love, you can easily bring out the best in each other. If you have some more tips to share with our readers, please write in the comment section below.

--

Did you know that you can get stories like this on the Yahoo mail app?
Download it here.

Yahoo Cricket

Latest News

  • Tally of oil-soaked wildlife, alive and dead, mounts in California
    Tally of oil-soaked wildlife, alive and dead, mounts in California

    By Steve Gorman and Alan Devall LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - The carcasses of five petroleum-soaked pelicans have been recovered from California's Santa Barbara coastline, the first apparent sea bird fatalities stemming from the oil spill to be documented by officials overseeing the disaster response. The tally was reported Friday by the joint-agency command for cleanup and recovery operations in Santa Barbara and Dr. Michael Ziccardi, a veterinarian from the University of California, Davis, who …

  • U.S. deejay Kasem's widow will not face criminal charges

    The widow of American radio personality Casey Kasem will not face criminal charges in connection with his death, prosecutors said on Friday, despite allegations of abuse from three of his adult children. The Los Angeles County District Attorney's Office said there was not enough evidence to charge 61-year-old Jean Kasem, the former "American Top 40" deejay's second wife, with his death last June. Kasem died in Washington state after suffering from Lewy Body disease, a form of dementia with …

  • Argentina's president seeks arts legacy with concert hall
    Argentina's president seeks arts legacy with concert hall

    By Sarah Marsh BUENOS AIRES (Reuters) - With less than a year to go in her presidency, Cristina Fernandez has sought her place in Argentina's cultural history, unveiling Latin America's largest arts complex, housed in Buenos Aires's historic former Post and Telegraph Palace. Named after Fernandez's late husband and predecessor, Nestor Kirchner, the Kirchner Cultural Center's focal piece is an avant-garde bulbous "blue whale" auditorium. Entry will be free to ensure it is a space for "the …

  • Sotheby's features abstract art sale in NY Latam spring auctions
    Sotheby's features abstract art sale in NY Latam spring auctions

    Works of art by Colombian artist Fernando Botero, Cuban artist Wilfredo Lam and Mexican painter Rufino Tamayo are expected to be among the highlights of Sotheby's Latin American spring art auctions next week, which will also include a special sale of abstract art. Tamayo's "La Familia," which has been in his family and is fresh to the market, is expected to be the top lot of Sotheby's two-day sales on May 26 and 27 with a presale estimate of up to $1.6 million. "His work with sand, earth and …

  • TLC pulls '19 Kids and Counting' after molestation reports
    TLC pulls '19 Kids and Counting' after molestation reports

    By Daina Beth Solomon LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - U.S. cable network TLC said on Friday it has pulled all episodes of "19 Kids and Counting," its top-rated television reality show featuring a large Christian family, after reports surfaced that the eldest son had molested underage girls as a teen. Josh Duggar, 27, the son, issued an apology Thursday, acknowledging "wrongdoing," but did not directly address allegations reported by In Touch magazine and other websites. "We are deeply saddened and …

  • U.S. director's "Little Prince" gets French premiere at Cannes
    U.S. director's "Little Prince" gets French premiere at Cannes

    By Michael Roddy CANNES, France (Reuters) - The creators of the animated film "The Little Prince", which had its world premiere at the Cannes festival on Friday, knew they had to take extra care in adapting one of the most cherished works of 20th-century French literature for the screen. To that end, American director Mark Osborne ("The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie") has created a story within a story in which a Little Girl, voiced by Mackenzie Foy (the 10-year old Murph in "Interstellar") is …

  • Koons sculpture raises 12 million euros at Cannes AIDS auction
    Koons sculpture raises 12 million euros at Cannes AIDS auction

    A huge sculpture called "Coloring Book" by American artist Jeff Koons sold for 12 million euros ($13.2 million) at a star-studded charity auction near Cannes that raised more than 33 million euros for AIDS research. Sienna Miller, Jake Gyllenhaal, Diane Kruger, Michael Fassbender and Marion Cotillard were among the celebrities and millionaires at the annual amfAR "Cinema Against AIDS" event on Thursday night at the luxury Hotel de Cap-Eden-Roc in Antibes. At the gala, a highlight during the …

  • Rajkumar Hirani produces his sister's play

    Mumbai, May 22 (IANS) Filmmaker Rajkumar Hirani, who last directed the successful "PK" is now all set to produce his sister Anju Kishinchandani's play "Growing Up" based on puberty. Anju is quite excited to present her play in front of an audience. "When I first heard Anju's concept of the storyline, I was immediately hooked. …

Loading...